tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post1396729808737486388..comments2024-03-10T00:27:43.883-08:00Comments on <center>Aimee L. Salter</center>: FIRST 500 CRITIQUE #4 - "Reconstruction"AimeeLSalterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17763596557256341788noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-15765498762926642192013-03-14T10:05:55.843-07:002013-03-14T10:05:55.843-07:00I have only been to this blog a couple time by kee...I have only been to this blog a couple time by keep finding myself coming back. It is very content rich. I will be back soon. Good job! Keep it up! Thanks!... :)<br /><br /><a href="http://ncrformsprinting.com/" rel="nofollow">NCR forms printing</a>Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453005333375608092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-2595395764948129462013-02-21T05:34:19.701-08:002013-02-21T05:34:19.701-08:00Keep up the good work bro.This post is really grea...Keep up the good work bro.This post is really great and I truly enjoyed reading it.Waiting for some more great posts like this from you in the coming days.Self book Publisher Bloghttp://selfbookpublisherblog.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-80662203055185782822012-12-16T07:56:47.410-08:002012-12-16T07:56:47.410-08:00Hey, I just hopped over to your site via Stumbleup...Hey, I just hopped over to your site via Stumbleupon. Not somthing I would normally read, but I liked your thoughts none the less. Thanks for making something worth reading.Meniscus surgeryhttp://www.kneeandhipsurgery.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-27019337490411709152011-04-02T12:43:14.258-07:002011-04-02T12:43:14.258-07:00I wish critics would refrain from using phrases su...I wish critics would refrain from using phrases such as "the reader wants". Readers are not a collective. They don't all want the same things. Some operate at a Dick and Jane level, while others prefer Dr. Seuss (metaphorically speaking, of course).Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05536293384635588296noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-28129637134729192192011-04-02T06:58:29.701-07:002011-04-02T06:58:29.701-07:00In the early drafts of my ms I started with a scen...In the early drafts of my ms I started with a scene that ultimately (after its own edits) became scene 2. The problem was it did not engage the reader in the MC. There was lots of "tension" but no reason to care what happened to my MC. You seem to have the opposite situation. You do a good job of making your MC likable, but it needs tension. The reader wants to sense that something is going to change in her life and they want to stay with her and find out. Stay with it. I've lost count of how many times I tweeked/rewritten the opening and I suspect its still not there yet.Karen A Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14059555184380048745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-69616063825163283992011-04-01T09:28:32.467-07:002011-04-01T09:28:32.467-07:00Terron is right about the first chapter. I've ...Terron is right about the first chapter. I've seen a lot of advice from top tier authors that they don't even worry about the first chapter until after writing the last chapter. <br /><br />I feel that Amber, like me, takes a while to build up some steam. When you start a new piece its hard because no matter how much character research or how many outlines you write you don't really get to know your characters until you write them. <br /><br />I got a feeling that chapter 15 flows like water. You can already see it start to come together after 500.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-22861187076792997602011-04-01T06:14:08.808-07:002011-04-01T06:14:08.808-07:00You have some great descriptions and a natural tal...You have some great descriptions and a natural talent for placing the reader in your world. I feel I have a sense of who Lauren is--steady, dependable, takes care of her family. <br /><br />Is this a romance? If so and clay is the love interest, you may also want to hint at why Lauren is single. Is it by choice? Lost love or jilted before? Feels she has enough men in her life to worry about? Disregard all of this if its not a romance. :)<br /><br /><b>Terron</b> spoke words of truth:<br />"Don't get discouraged. The first chapter is usually the worst because people usually write it first. Ironically, it's also the most important. It will get rehashed over and over before it's ready."<br /><br />The starting point is the hardest to pin down because we want to work into it. I think my first chapter has been rewritten at least four times more often than the rest of the book. <br /><br />Don't give up because you can write. Think about what is the most important setting bits to keep and I think you can condense this section to half the size so we get to Clay faster.<br /><br />Thanks for sharing!Charity Bradfordhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01960821077619680661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2622477097361465.post-53448288315772857202011-03-31T21:40:12.014-07:002011-03-31T21:40:12.014-07:00Amber,
A large portion of this first section has ...Amber,<br /><br />A large portion of this first section has a very choppy feel to it. He did this...she did that...they went here...etc. While details like that can be important, try breaking them up with other details--or just get more creative in the way you tell it.<br /><br />I recommend placing a lot more depth at the beginning. Introduce a conflict that plays on the readers' hopes and fears as soon as possible. As Aimee said, there isn't much going on in the story that pulls me through it and makes we want to keep reading.<br /><br />Don't get discouraged. The first chapter is usually the worst because people usually write it first. Ironically, it's also the most important. It will get rehashed over and over before it's ready.Terron Jameshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03508184587009172827noreply@blogger.com